(Buckle up. Lots of words in this one.)
Hi! Finally had my Fitness Consult - the free one you get for signing up.
It...wasn't great, but also wasn't as bad as I thought. My stats:
Weight: 210
Body Fat %: 40! (um, yikes? but to be honest with you, I seriously thought it would be 50 or more. Not even joking. So, I know it's not good and the trainer told me as much [Um, guy, I KNOW. No need to shame me into anything - that's why I'm here!] but...yay for small, relative victories?)
I did two planks each for 20 seconds.
I did 6 pull ups (WAIT FOR IT - with about half my weight supported. HA! This cracks me up. I am curious to see how this changes if I keep at it)
I did 6 modified push ups using the bosu stability ball.
He had me do 10 minutes on the stairclimber then these other random step up balance things for my legs.
Basically, the diagnosis other than "FOR SHAME" is legs = decent, core + arms = awful. I pretty much knew that already.
So at some point this week he's going to email me with a workout plan for me to follow for about a month or so. 2 days cardio and 1 day cardio/strength. I'm gonna start with that and work my way up to...something.
I guess I'm excited. It's been a long day today (I left my house at 7am and I'm just now getting home at 9pm) so my enthusiasm has drained...but it was very much there until about 20 minutes ago!
In other REALLY EXCITING NEWS, I'm moving out the first weekend in July!!!!! Remember in my last post I mentioned that one I saw that I loved? Well that very one will be mine!! I'll have 2 roommates - who are awesome, and I think we already click. We're getting together tomorrow night after work to kind of celebrate my future-roommate-status, I think. I can't wait!
My commute will be cut in half in both time and expense (though I'm adding rent, but...it's the principle of the thing!) and there is a gym in the building, in addition to another branch of my new gym right nearby.
I cannot wait to move and be on my own. Is it a little scary? Yes. It is long overdue? You bet it is. So I am pumped.
Another fun thing is that starting mid-July, I'm signing up for a bocce ball league with a friend of mine - he works at the place I was temping and we've kept in touch. His friends have a team and invited me to join - so I'm doing it! I think the best part about this is that I will already be living in Alexandria, so I never have to make my "Here Are the Reasons I Live at Home" speech again. That will be so nice. So relieving.
I'm looking forward to my social circle expanding. I know I'm not the svelte shape I want to be, but my confidence is still growing. I'll meet new people. Live in a new place. My job is still very much new and probably will feel that way for about a year or so. I'm good with new, I thrive on new. I'm so excited about what I can accomplish the rest of this year. Maybe landing a man will happen, maybe it won't. I'm okay with it either way.
Oh, speaking of which, can I just...talk something out? I don't want to insult anyone by telling the story I'm about to tell, but...it made me uncomfortable and maybe I need some alternate perspectives here.
So I was on the phone with my best friend, who recently found out that I had been doing EHarmony. Now, she is the type of gal that since high school has literally never been single for more than 2 weeks. Not even exaggerating. So "love" is very much important to her, because she's always had it. She's been after another friend of ours to start dating for a few years now, and even so far as saying she was going to buy her an online dating subscription for Christmas a year or two ago. She didn't end up doing it, but I always found that a little...inappropriately aggressive?
So anyway, when she and I were talking on the phone, she was like "I'm so proud of you, that's so great. I'm going to pray for you." and then to be honest, I don't remember what the rest of the conversation was.
Now, here's where you might get mad at me, for my ignorance and narrow-mindedness. So I apologize in advance. But when I hear that someone is going to pray for me, I take it as...I need to be prayed for, if that makes sense. Like...I'll pray for you to find a man. Because you need one to be fulfilled as a person.
I mean...I said thank you to her, but I..didn't quite know how else to react. I think I might have taken offense to it, actually. And I don't really take offense to a lot of things.
I guess...I mean...when I was looking for jobs, some friends and family (and maybe even some of you might have?) said that you were going to pray for me. And I thought nothing of it, other than, "that's really nice of them" - because it was something I desperately needed.
Is praying for someone reserved for dire circumstances? I don't pray often but when I do, it's when I feel someone really truly needs it. Like...they've got a problem that needs fixing. Maybe I'm just projecting because I subconsciously also think it's a problem and don't want someone else seeing it to?
But do I really, truly need a man? No. I very badly want a man, sure, but I am a complete, whole person without one. So...do you really need to pray for me?
Is anyone following my train of thought here? I mean, I understand my friend was being nice, and she loves me and cares about me..it just...bugged me.
If you have a dissenting opinion, please explain this to me! I don't mean to make waves, I just want to understand a little more.
LinkWithin
11 comments:
Its awesome that you're gonna get out on your own!
As for the conversation with your friend... I probably would have been a little taken aback by her comment too. But, maybe you can think about it this way... She knows you WANT a man in your life and she is your friend and wants you to be happy... so there is no harm in praying that you will find the happiness you WANT. Now if she had randomly said she was going to pray for you find a man when you weren't doing anything toward finding one... that would be a whole different story in my mind.
Just my thought on it... :)
I wouldn't take offense if I were you... she meant it in kindness, surely... and no bad comes from being prayed for. I don't think that prayer need be for "dire cases", emergency situations or terrible situations alone. The Bible says we have not because we ask not, seek and ye shall find, etc... God loves to hear all of our requests, whether it be for a parking space or for a cancer healing. :) I can see how it would feel like she meant "prayer is the only thing that can help this situation", but in truth - you know that's not what she meant, and you know she wants what's best for you. I say... be longsuffering (towards your friend), be patient, be kind, don't take offense, and pray about this situation and I bet God will give you a peace about it that only He can give.
As far as the conversation with your friend goes, I would have reacted the same way you did. Be nice and say thank you but then once you had a moment to think about it, think WTF...
I think at the end of the day, a true friend would want/pray/wish for your happiness, in her eyes, that may be the comfort of a relationship/man etc. But for you (strong independent woman) a relationship doesn't define you it complements you.
As I've always said, I love my life just the way it is, if I can find someone who can complement my life then it only enhances my short time on this earth, but that I didn't want to complicate things.
I'm so excited for/jealous of all the fun new stuff happening in your life!
Yeah, I totally get where you're coming from with your reaction; I do that, too. Even though it's not my thing, if people say that to me regarding the job search or depression or something, I'm like "thanks" because it's kind of them. Pray that I'll find a man? Meh. Some people put so much value into finding That Special Person, and I think that we're doing a great job putting more value in ourselves, especially as we're losing weight and getting more confidence and stuff. It was a nice gesture on her part but shows how much different your values and priorities are.
Hi. I just found your blog, and I must say it's wonderful! It's been interesting reading about your journey (although I admit I haven't finished reading all of your past blog posts). As strange as it seems I feel that I can relate to you (also a 20-something attempting to lose about 100 lbs). It's nice to be able to follow someone who is actually doing this!
Maybe you could just say back, I'll pray for you too...and leave her wondering, hahahaha!
I think you should have said, "Oh, that's so nice of you, but I'm fine whether I'm dating or not. Save your prayers for Kyrgyzstan. I think they really need it. Have you heard about what's going on there this week?" Or you could have said, "Oh, that's nice of you, but if you're going to pray for me, focus it not on my dating status but on this weird rash that's developed right near my armpit. Have I shown you that?" Haha. I'm sure it was well-intentioned and all, trying to pray for you to get what you want, but assert your (correct) position that a man isn't essential to your happiness. I also like the retort directly above -- that you'll pray for her too!
I'm with you about the praying business. To me, that's like calling 911 to see what time the movie starts at the theater.
I know it was rough to get that assessment, but like you say, you kinda knew what it was gonna be, and now that it's behind you, you can start moving toward a better place. When I'm doing poorly, I stay off the scale and purposely don't look at calories on foods I purchase, as if not knowing will make it not be bad. Knowledge is power... and you've taken a very important first step. Of course, it's only important if you follow it up with a lot of other steps.
Best of luck to you!
hey old friend- i covet your hot hourglass figure! i had the diamond motivation blog and i finally killed it and started over just yesterday. please come back- and come visit! i want to hear about how you ran off with a trainer or something...sara
Just out of curiosity, which gym did you join?
I work for WSC as a trainer and we do free fitness assessments so thats why i was wondering:) love the blog! keep up your awesome work!
I stopped by your blog today. I had to laugh at your "Praying" comment. Some people say it and it can be comforting and others say it like it's a threat. Just say "thank you" and move on. Sounds like you are making good changes in your life.
Ann
Less of Me
Post a Comment