you know what i realized? i like writing. i'm not great at it, but i enjoy it. and i also seem to do better during the week (health-wise) when i have little goals to focus on. so i'mma gonna try both of those things.
sidebar the first: if you're curious (by "you" i mean...OHAI I'M FLAKY ABOUT WRITING ON THE INTERTUBEZ), i currently weigh somewhere in the 232-236 range. i'm not quite sure b/c my official weigh-in day is tuesday (morning), and i was at 232. then for funsies (by "funsies" i mean, i shouldn't have done it) i weighed myself this morning. 236. so, what? maybe i was dehydrated on tuesday morning, maybe too much salt last night? i don't know. anyway, i'm just going to wait until next tuesday and see what happens!
okay. right. goals.
for the next week:
*i will go to the gym (or exercise in general) two more times before next wednesday's appointment with the trainer.
*i will walk *home* from the metro 4 out of 5 weekdays.
*i will make 2 multiple-serving recipes to have for meals.
that's it for now. i could add "writing all my meals" or "keeping a food/mood journal" or "actually do the homework my therapist told me to do" but i'm going to keep it simple and very focused.
**
in other news that is completely counterproductive to all health goals, i am having a REALLY fun social week. monday evening and tomorrow evening were/will be spent getting drinks with dear dear friends. and on friday, at work, we're having a combination engagement/new year's party. new year's, i know, it's a whole thing that really isn't worth explaining, suffice it to say it's *totally* adorable that we're doing it. :)
25 July 2012
22 July 2012
everything's coming up millhouse
hi loves. i just want to start off by saying, i thought to myself just before i started writing this "yes, i'm updating this so much sooner! look at me go!" and then i looked at the date stamp...a month ago!? where is the time going!? yeesh.
so this was the past six months, per my earlier post:
*i quit okcupid.
*went to jazzfest in new orleans.
*MOVED INTO MY OWN APARTMENT
*got a raving review and there is a pending promotion and raise with my name on it (pending, because, room in the budget. soooo, there's a likely chance that it won't happen because i work for a nonprofit that has zero dollars. but it's the thought that counts? question mark?
*turned 29. (WAAAAAAT...still not used to that one.)
that fourth item? the pending promotion about which i was highly skeptical? i got it! so I'm now manager level at my organization, with a decent size raise, and in the next week or two i will move into an office! very exciting stuff.
i mostly just have a mish mash of things to share, some good, some not so good.
good:
*recipe: mini egg muffins - kale, feta cheese, a smiiiiidge of garlic salt, and egg whites, baked in my silicon mini-muffin pan for 20 minutes at 375. These perfect little 1-2 bite nuggets of deliciousness. If you crush one over a piece of whole wheat toast and maybe add a smidge of salsa or ketchup on it, you can thank me later.
not good:
*last week during therapy, i confessed to my counselor that i had in NO way worked on my homework for the few weeks, which was to have healthy dinners 4 out of 5 weeknights. it was like, one, at most. i was getting delivery and eating out like crazy. her response? "you know, we haven't talked about it seriously, but, because you've tried to do this on your own and it hasn't worked, you might want to consider overeaters anonymous" ... i pretty much broke down right then and there. tears. lots of them. i was so ashamed that such a thing would even be suggested to me, because, am i really that bad? has it come to the point where i need to follow a program with the same structure that heroin addicts follow?
after the tears stopped and our session was over, the shame and sadness turned to anger. my homework from that session was to listen in to 2 conference calls of overeaters anonymous. i have yet to do it. not surprisingly, my eating has been MUCH better this past week. eating food i make, eating food with actual nutrients, etc.
i'm still not sure what to make of it. i don't even like to think about it. i don't want to. i just don't. whether i'm being stubborn, or giving it another honest try on my own, i just...i just don't know if i can. i can be really stubborn, and this is one of those times.
good:
*last week at a session with my trainer, i held a plank for 30 seconds. then i did a different exercise, and then i held a plank for another 30 seconds. about a month ago i could barely do 10 seconds. i honestly have no idea how i did it, but i felt really good. i still feel really good about it.
maybe good?
*in september i'm headed to chattanooga, tn for a few days for the arts education partnership's national forum. i have one night open to me - any suggestions? i've never been to anywhere in tennessee, actually. any "must do's" in chattanooga?
not good, kinda:
*i did a zumba class this morning (that part is good) but HOLY JESUS my lack of coordination! and the thing is, i can dance. i have rhythm and i can bust a decent move. but i have the coordination of an emu on rollerskates during zumba. what gives.
so this was the past six months, per my earlier post:
*i quit okcupid.
*went to jazzfest in new orleans.
*MOVED INTO MY OWN APARTMENT
*got a raving review and there is a pending promotion and raise with my name on it (pending, because, room in the budget. soooo, there's a likely chance that it won't happen because i work for a nonprofit that has zero dollars. but it's the thought that counts? question mark?
*turned 29. (WAAAAAAT...still not used to that one.)
that fourth item? the pending promotion about which i was highly skeptical? i got it! so I'm now manager level at my organization, with a decent size raise, and in the next week or two i will move into an office! very exciting stuff.
i mostly just have a mish mash of things to share, some good, some not so good.
good:
*recipe: mini egg muffins - kale, feta cheese, a smiiiiidge of garlic salt, and egg whites, baked in my silicon mini-muffin pan for 20 minutes at 375. These perfect little 1-2 bite nuggets of deliciousness. If you crush one over a piece of whole wheat toast and maybe add a smidge of salsa or ketchup on it, you can thank me later.
not good:
*last week during therapy, i confessed to my counselor that i had in NO way worked on my homework for the few weeks, which was to have healthy dinners 4 out of 5 weeknights. it was like, one, at most. i was getting delivery and eating out like crazy. her response? "you know, we haven't talked about it seriously, but, because you've tried to do this on your own and it hasn't worked, you might want to consider overeaters anonymous" ... i pretty much broke down right then and there. tears. lots of them. i was so ashamed that such a thing would even be suggested to me, because, am i really that bad? has it come to the point where i need to follow a program with the same structure that heroin addicts follow?
after the tears stopped and our session was over, the shame and sadness turned to anger. my homework from that session was to listen in to 2 conference calls of overeaters anonymous. i have yet to do it. not surprisingly, my eating has been MUCH better this past week. eating food i make, eating food with actual nutrients, etc.
i'm still not sure what to make of it. i don't even like to think about it. i don't want to. i just don't. whether i'm being stubborn, or giving it another honest try on my own, i just...i just don't know if i can. i can be really stubborn, and this is one of those times.
good:
*last week at a session with my trainer, i held a plank for 30 seconds. then i did a different exercise, and then i held a plank for another 30 seconds. about a month ago i could barely do 10 seconds. i honestly have no idea how i did it, but i felt really good. i still feel really good about it.
maybe good?
*in september i'm headed to chattanooga, tn for a few days for the arts education partnership's national forum. i have one night open to me - any suggestions? i've never been to anywhere in tennessee, actually. any "must do's" in chattanooga?
not good, kinda:
*i did a zumba class this morning (that part is good) but HOLY JESUS my lack of coordination! and the thing is, i can dance. i have rhythm and i can bust a decent move. but i have the coordination of an emu on rollerskates during zumba. what gives.
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