Q&A

Q: Soooo where have you been, missy?

A: Um, generally hiding and being unhappy with life.

Q: Have you been eating well?

A: Do you consider a new obsession with McGriddles “well”?

Q: What about exercising?

A: The five minute walk from the metro to my office (and back again) and walking up the escalators.

Q: So…no, is what you’re saying.

A: Yeah, no.

Q: How much do you weigh?

A: Somewhere in the 230-240 range is my guess. I haven’t weighed myself in a few weeks, and that was many sausage, egg, cheese on a croissants ago, so it’s anybody’s guess.

Q: What’s your deal with breakfast sandwiches?

A: I don’t know, man, I don’t know.

Q: So what brings you here anyway?

A: A lack of motivation to do work on a Friday?

Q: No but really.

A: To say that, I went to the doctor a few times and found out I have borderline high cholesterol, so, I actually do need to eat better, McGriddles aside.

Q: How many McGriddles have you had!?

A: Actually just one, yesterday morning. But holy hell was it amazing.

Q: Anything else you’d like to share?

A: Yeah. Wellbutrin. I mean, I don’t want to share my stash but I started taking it yesterday. Between a really mentally/emotionally unhealthy work environment and my weight gain due to stress and emotional eating, I’m really unhappy…and I’ve been seeing a therapist for about a month which has been great but I need some extra help. Plus Wellbutrin is a stimulant and an appetite suppressant…

Q: Do you want Wellbutrin to do all the diet and exercise work for you?

A: Yep.

Q: You realize that’s ridiculous.

A: Yep.

Q: Well how do you feel so far?

A: Um, I’m sure a lot of it is only psychosomatic at this point, but, I feel good. It feels like I have more energy to do the basic things like…showering, brushing my teeth, cooking for myself, that were a struggle to do before, which were fairly clear signs of depression. And whether it’s psychosomatic or actually working, I’ll take it either way.

Q: Yeah that’s true. Well good!

A: Thank you. I was initially scared to admit that I might need it, and it felt like I was admitting that something is fundamentally wrong with me – even though counseling has taught me better, I still have perfectionist tendencies and I have issues with something being “wrong” with me. But I’m an adult and it’s my job to make myself feel better, so I’m trying.

Q: That sounds reasonable.

A: Sure, I guess. We’ll see in a couple of weeks when it takes effect.

Q: So, a low-cholesterol diet, hm?

A: IT’S LIKE THEY’RE TAKING AWAY MY HAPPINESS.

Q: Whoa there tiger.

A: I’m sorry, I know.

Q: Is this still about McGriddles?

A: THEY HAVE LITTLE TINY POCKETS OF MAPLE SYRUP THAT BLEND IN WITH THE SAVORY FLAVORS! IT’S GENIUS.

Taking part of my lunch break to drop some knowledge

Okay Steve and Keri, you asked for it...don't say I didn't warn you.

PB Puffins, street code name Crack, are a delicious cereal.

Dish This says it best: "This puffin is like the dieter's version of Joe the Camel - sure he looks all cute and cuddly, but really he unlocks the door to something addictive and dangerous..."

I guess the stats aren't terrible, but only when you look at them from a 1-serving-size-perspective. 15 handfuls later, maybe not so much? OHBUTTHEY'RESOGOOD. I'm sorry, the addict inside of me crept out for a second there.  

I would tell you to go out and get some because they're amazing, but I don't want to contribute to anyone's Puffin Bender and inevitable downward spiral into this cereal addiction.

When I was getting ready for work this morning, I was literally carrying the box around with me. Like all over the house. Like a child carries his/her favorite blankie. I was carrying the Puffins but I didn't end up eating any because I ran out of time, but I WANTED THEM and COULDN'T PUT THEM DOWN. Yikes, friends.

PS - my lunch today is DELICIOUS and super healthy and adorably packaged. I took pictures. You'll see it later :-)