I did two things today that I am proud of.
1: I went to the gym! I only went for 25 minutes on the treadmill, and only 3 of them were jogging, but I went. I got dressed in workout clothes and went. After a week of nothing and a week of only going twice, that is a big deal. It felt good.
2: I have plans to meet up with a friend of mine tonight – we had originally decided on Panera (her suggestion and I just went with it) so I had researched the web site and their nutritional values and picked out a couple of options. I was prepared. Then she texts me today and says “Wanna see our new place and we can get pizza instead?” WELL, CRAP. I do want to see her new place, but the pizza thing…no. I would normally just say yes, to be easy. It’s the easiest route – I come off as low maintenance, I don’t draw attention to my weight loss efforts, basically, there’s no perceived scrutiny towards me.
On the other more reasonable hand, this is my life. So I wrote back: “Is it okay if its not pizza? Trying to avoid that stuff if I can…lame I know…maybe I can just swing by after dinnertime if its easier? I don’t want to make dinner a pain and all difficult :-P”
And yes, I do text with full sentences like that. These “R U”s and “l8r”s and “C U” nonsense…can’t stand it.
Anyway, I was proud of myself for saying no. She hasn't written back yet (pretty sure she's at work right now....like I'd like to be....SAVE THAT FOR ANOTHER WHINY POST) but I'm glad I didn't just say yes even though I didn't want it. And I felt I had to add unnecessary self-deprecation in there, or else I wouldn’t be comfortable with it. I know saying No to pizza isn't really lame, it just feels like one of those things you have to put in there to not put down someone else’s choice. Even though I know it’s not that big of a deal. Or I had to say it first before she thought it, ya know? (Yes, I am completely neurotic.)
[Edit: I got a text back from her, and she said: "omg of course! come on over and then we'll get take out from panera or something, i'm all about their fuji apple salad" So, success! Back to my original - sort of - plan. And also, I don't know where I get this idea that other people will look down on my good eating habits if/when I decline unhealthy foods - maybe it's more of a projection of my own emotional nonsense. Either way, I sure do get worked up over nothing, don't I?]